I am a great believer in the fact that any decision you make, once it is a considered decision, is the right decision – regardless of the outcome. It was the right thing to do at that time.
That does not mean that all my decisions have gone the way I hoped or expected. Experience has taught me that I can’t allow the fear of it “going wrong” or “not getting it right” hold me back from taking the risk.
Over my years in business, sometimes I did find myself looking back and saying “If only, I had done this / that back then” or more destructively “Sure I tried it and did not work, so it won’t work now”. I came to realise that just because “it was”, doesn’t mean it will always be.
When talking to my clients, I find that three things can sometimes hold them back.
1. UNABLE TO ACCEPT CHANGE
Embrace change – Make it work for you.
The only constant in life is change, yet the confidence to change can stop people moving forward. Maybe you don’t understand what is needed for the change or why the change is required.
Maybe you are afraid of the change because of an issue / experience in the past that left a lasting negative impression. However, that's all it is - an impression.
Observe the change proposed and consider how you can make this work for you. Then try it!
2. FEAR OF FAILURE
Feel it and do it anyway.
Fear of not getting it right, fear of what people might say, fear of going backwards has kept a lot of my clients stuck. If you are constantly afraid of failure, of it not working out, of waiting till the right moment, then you will never take risks.
Learn to love the uncertainty, be flexible, trust that it will be ok… and you will be ok.
Set boundaries and milestones to check your progress. If it doesn’t work, try something else, at least you have tried. Look at all the learning you have achieved on the way.
Just because it happened before does not mean it will happen again. You are different, the fact that you have had a past experience, is the difference. Those around you are different, the world is constantly changing. So just do it.
3. COMPARING THEMSELVES TO OTHER
You are unique – Be You.
Stop looking at others around you and how far they have come, we have successes at different stages in our lives. Consider just looking at where YOU were in the past and WHAT you are doing now and notice the difference. Regardless of what that difference is, there is a difference. Now... look for the progress, no matter how small.
If you feel there is no difference, ask yourself WHY. Then go back to point number 1 & 2 above. Give yourself permission to be the best version of yourself.
Be YOU – because YOU is wonderful.